Dating And Seduction

If She Earns More Than You, Run Away

Fellow men (and boys), If you want to have a happily-ever-after relationship, never date or marry a lady who ‘makes more money than you. Even if her paycheck has one bob more than yours, don’t date her. You must never allow yourself to feel like a bonsai in a grove of redwoods — no. When it comes to finances, you must always be a towering tree, magnificent and stable in comparison with your female partner. Your financial footing ought to be higher than hers at all times.

Now, I do not bear any underlying resentment for women whose bank account balances have as many digits as KPLC tokens. Kudos to all the females out there who work hard and climb the corporate ladder without parting their thighs or backstabbing people. Kudos to all females who own highly profitable business as well. But as a man, unless you are killing it in your career too, avoid such women. Always opt for a woman who earns less and looks up to you instead.

When you manage to seduce a woman who never has a shortage of paper, you might think, umeangukia but the reality is that umeangukiwa na mashida. The saying ‘a woman’s money is hers alone while the man’s money is for the couple’ is so true. The biggest mistake guys make when rushing to date high-earning women is believing that they will get lots of easy financial benefits. They think they wont have to work so hard after all. The lady will take care of most of the expenses right?

Yeah right. But the ‘right’ in this context has an expiry date. If she loves you, she will be okay with taking care of things for a few months……only for a few months. After that, her fangs will protrude. When she realizes she has a higher purchasing power than you and you have no chance of ever surpassing her, she’s gonna boss you and make your life a living hell. Moreso,  she is never going to submit to you.

Unsatisfied with your current state of stagnation, she’ll start pressuring you to do better in your career even when it’s clear that you are trying your best. She’ll push you to achieve more and work harder in order to takeover as the main earner. Understand that she won’t be pushing you because she loves you and wants you to be successful. She’ll pushing you to earn more so that she can at least save most of of her money and brag to her friends how her man is doing well.

Her pressure on you won’t be healthy for you or the relationship as you will remain dissatisfied until you are able to accomplish getting the higher salary. Chances are that you might not manage to make as much as her. Eventually she will acquire a ‘you-can’t-tell-me-nothing’ personality until either you or her walks out.

That’s exactly how things will unfold. Don’t ever think you will be sorted financially when you convince a high-flying woman to ingia box. It is her money. Traditional men look at women as sacred possessions and take pride in providing for their women and children. Women, even good women, just don’t have this characteristic. And even when they have this characteristic, it’s temporary. Money she earns is her money and she isn’t going to just let you enjoy it.

Dating a woman who earns higher than you will also make you feel like a loser most of the time. And you know what happens when you feel like a loser? Your situation never changes. When it rains it pours and whenever you feel like you are losing in life, you tend to keep losing. You might want to be happy for her but instead, your lady’s career success will make you feel bad about yourself day in day out. You will feel inadequate. You will feel like you are less of a man. This will be topped up by feelings of insecurity. Constant fears of her finding a bit of extra-curricular ‘bolstering’ on the side with a guy who is more successful will keep on haunting you.  When she tells you ” I am going to a work event” ,you will see it as code for ‘I’m going to a lodging with my colleague from the finance department who drives a BMW.’

You might have been told “the challenges of being married to a ‘strong’ woman will push you to reach your untapped potential.” Such a lie. A woman who works 8-10 hours a day is a tired, worn out, and cranky woman every day of the week. When it is 7 p.m. and she hasn’t had time to cook, clean, work out, or anything, she is going to be in a bitchy, nagging mood, not a loving, caring mood. This is hardly best environment for self-improvement.

Another important thing worth noting is that a high earning woman will always lack time for two most important things that an African man likes seeing his woman do. These two things are having sex with you and taking care of house business i.e cooking, cleaning.  It might also mean that when she’s actually free and not distracted with work that she’s absolutely exhausted and not up for doing anything or putting time and effort into the relationship.  If she has a career that requires lots of hours, you will find that you have to construct your life according to her job schedule—whether that’s planning what you will do in your free time or when to go out, you will be forced to follow her lead.

When dating a high-earning woman, it will just be too hard not to be disturbed by her success. Even when she is being sincere about something, you wont help but think she’s trying to be bossy because she makes more than you.If you’ve grown up with the goal that you will be taking care of your family and looking after them financially and spend all your life thinking that this will be the case, you could be sorely disappointed when these dreams are ruined. Guys who aim for their family to be dependent on them and get satisfaction from knowing that they are completely looking after their loved ones might not be able to adjust to having a rival breadwinner in the form of their partner. It will definitely lead to incompatibility issues in the relationship as you both have different life goals and ambitions

The truth is a man should always be the breadwinner. You lose a large part of your masculinity by not being the breadwinner. Once you see how the people close to you have no respect for your authority (because you have none) or how your wife/girlfriend talks down to you constantly (because she doesn’t respect you), you will understand.

They say ‘More money more problems!’ That’s true if it’s the woman with more money. But if it’s the man with more money, then it’s ‘More money more peace!’


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About Philip Etemesi

I am the sheriff in this town. Writing is my joie de vivre. I am a superman thanks to God. Find me on Whatsapp via 0771048899

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Tukatiane is a 'Relationships and Sex' website run by award winning Kenyan writer Philip Etemesi. His goal is to help everyone have excellent relationships as well as healthy sex lives. Other goals are to provide entertainment to readers through witty and edgy stories.
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