Your Close Friend Is Your Closet Enemy

A close friend is just an enemy in the closet.

So I’ve been keenly following the story of Nick Mutuma being accused of sexual misconduct. The matter was brought to the public by a guy known as Koome Gitobu, leaving many shell-shocked.  Gitobu claimed that while torqued with lust at an event, the actor forcefully attempted to bang his girl. He explained how his girl confessed to him after months of being silent. As a result, Mutuma has now gone from a hunky darling for females and one of Kenya’s biggest success stories in film to a national shame and convenient proxy for feminist attacks.

What’s surprising is that this Koome guy was a very close friend of Nick Mutuma. They even used to work together at 91.5 Hits FM. Several tweets emerged showing how the guy used to praise Nick Mutuma like everyday. He even defended the Shuga actor viciously when he released a shitty song back in 2013 and everyone was trolling him.

Now I am neither gonna defend nor accuse Nick Mutuma . I wasn’t there so I can’t be sure what happened. I am just going to lay down the facts and the facts show that this Koome nigga is a fuddy-duddy big ass pussy.

If Koome was a real man, what should he have done when he was told that his friend had tried to luxuriate in his chick’s punani? A real man should have confronted the friend first before even thinking of exposing him. Koome didn’t do that. His first step was to rush to type a long threaded and persecutory rallying cry on Twitter and destroy his friend’s career. This tells you that damaging Mutuma’s reputation was in his mind all along. Every night before he slept, he told himself,“If I ever get the chance to finish this guy, I will.”

I personally would have matched to the friend’s house, fists clenched, ready to beat him up. But before beating him up, I would have asked him to explain himself like. “Buda….Ni nini hii naskia. Ati ulitry kurape dem yangu last year?”

The reaction of the friend would have determined which step I took next. If he became rude or tried to avoid the situation, I’d have beaten him up or brought my friends to beat him up if I didn’t match his size or strength. After that is when I would have exposed him. Coz If you accuse someone of something and they become rude or avoid you, it means they are guilty.

If he politely denied the accusations, I would have brought my girlfriend to confirm. How he reacted in front of my girlfriend would have determined if he was guilty or not. How my girlfriend reacted in front of him would also have determined if she was being truthful or not.

Koome didn’t even stop to think that maybe his girlfriend was lying to him. Maybe she cheated with Nick and just lied that he forced her so that she wouldn’t look guilty. Women can do or say anything when cornered. Also, if Nick did indeed assault her, why did she take that long to tell him, yet he’s her boyfriend and she knows him and Nick are friends? The incident allegedly happened a long time ago. What was she waiting for? A mature and honest girl would have told her boyfriend immediately.

A lot of questions have to be asked about the girl.

Back to Koome…..

Before you make a career-destroying accusation about your friend, you have to take grassroot measures. If this person is your true friend, you wouldn’t wanna just destroy him immediately over something you aren’t sure of.

Koome didn’t do that. He just rushed to Twitter to let the public know.  If he was a coward who couldn’t confront Nick first, the least he could have done was call him, press record and demand an explanation before exposing him. He didn’t do that either.

Koome was the parasitic friend all along. The parasitic friend secretly despises his patron, despite his excessive flattery, and will cater to the worst vices of his target.  A true friend will try to prevent harm from coming to his friend. Even when that friend has offended him in a major way, he will give him a fair hearing first before crucifying him.  But the false friend, being full of malignity and insolence, takes secret pleasure in seeing his patron dragged through the mud of doom.

That’s why there’s a possibility that he might have fabricated this whole thing. The whole way in which he tabled the accusation is suspect.

Koome’s moves have all the hallmarks of a jealous friend. A true friend would have followed the procedures that I wrote above. You can’t just destroy someone’s career without having all the facts…or because you feel you are morally superior to to them.

What goes around, comes around. You might be happy destroying someone today but you don’t know what will get you tomorrow. Everyone has dirt. Scandals come in many forms and so does Karma. They don’t have to be sexual. You might be the most decent person then when you’ve worked so hard and you are a CEO somewhere then someone who hates you accuses you of stealing money and you get sacked.

So yea, I am not saying that Nick Mutuma is not guilty. An article on The Standard cleansed the actor and revealed Gitobu concocted the story but I wont do the same. Personally, I’ll I say that we need to look at angles. If he truly is guilty, the girl should have a modicum of personal responsibility and come forward to confirm the allegations. Why hasn’t she exposed Nick herself anyway? All women who have exposed men all over the world have done it themselves. They didn’t hand over that responsibility to their spouses.

The mythological rape culture that feminists secretly wish would come to fruition is actually a projection of their desire to see a world in which women are exempted from personal responsibility and men bear all the burden of any female regret for romantic trysts.

I am also saying that you need to watch your back with friends. That friendship is a precious thing is a truism no one disputes. The ancient Stoics went so far as to value it more highly than love between man and woman. But don’t get too comfortable.Your close friend is an enemy in the closet.

Watch your back especially when you are doing better than your friend in life. Don’t lie to yourself that your pal has your best interests at heart, they most likely don’t. They’re likely jealous and they’ll destroy you if they get a chance, just like Koome did to Nick Mutuma. I doubt that Nick can get another major acting job at this point. When you google his name,all you see is rape. His biggest mistake? Aligning himself with a fake friend. Sad is an overused word in the interwebs but that is how this whole situation will be remembered.

The most dangerous type of false friend is the flatterer.  He insinuates himself into our good graces by adroitly playing into your emotions like this…..

Excessive praise casts doubt even on the sincerest friendship, and slowly corrupts the bonds of rectitude between men. Since friendship is commonly the result of similar tastes between men, the parasitic false friend uses these common interests to gain a toehold into the doorway of our emotions, and there embeds himself.  Just as a tick lodges itself in the ears of animals, so the parasitic friend also seeks out the ears of his patron, and uses his voice to gain entry into our sympathies.

Surveying history, we note how frequently men of power and influence have been taken down by fake friends once they reach the heights of power.  Why is this?  Even men of sound judgment feel the isolations and pressures of responsibility, and long for an emotional release.  The parasitic courtier, advisor, or sycophant provides this emotional release, at least in the short term.  But the consequence is betrayal.  Little by little, the patron becomes more isolated, more divorced from reality, and ultimately ruined.  Examples from history could fill volumes.

Your best defense against the false friend is knowledge of yourself.  When we know ourselves, and do not allow our heads to become too puffed up with flattery, we will not allow the parasite entry into the corridors of our emotional sympathies. Another defense against the false friend is a thorough knowledge of men and their motivations.

Make sure you radiate unearthly levels of awareness all the time. Have eyes at the back of your head.

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